Some things seem too good to be true, and some things seems too crazy to be real. This is similar to the life of those of us who suffer from Mental Illness. Like the weather, the things that happen from day to day, is either too good to be true, or so ridiculous that it seems unreal. As I sit here today, it is scorching outside. The sun is bright, and when we are normally dressing for Spring with jeans and a light jacket, the temperature calls for bathing suits, sandals and halter tops. Just last week there was rain daily, forty degrees and Winter coats. The weather last week makes this week too good to be true and when we are back in the forties with our coats on in a week or two it will seem completely unreal.
Several mood swings daily, major life-altering events daily, family issues etc. easily cause the exciting times of my life to appear to be too good to be true. It is difficult for me to become excited about the good things because it is always followed by so much bad that I do get excited but, also, anxious. Similarly, when the bad comes, it is unbelievably bad. The stories seem unreal. Sadly, this realization came to me when speaking with others who are going through. During my marriage, my husband accused me of being dramatic or blowing situations out of proportion. Now, when situations take place, I’m either lying on the other person, being sensitive, or IT’S ME…that is, until someone else
has the same experience. No one believes what we are going through because of our silence…because we continue to bear our load…we continue to press forward; some from survival instincts and some from being taught to. Nevertheless, because we silently carry our feelings of loneliness, depression, fear, worthlessness, rejection, being faced with foreclosure, eviction, termination, having an illness and various other issues while still making it, it appears unbelievable to those on the outside. We have to focus on the few that do care and not the many who don’t. Those who don’t will eliminate themselves. If we stop attempting to carry our load alone, our triumphs and tragedies won’t seem so unbelievable. Those who matter will know we are struggling and fighting along the way and may decide to fight with us. Our true friends add to our well-being, not take from it.
Throughout generations, mental illness has enslaved so many of us that we fail to work toward becoming a unified people…black, white, red, brow, African, American, Hispanic, young, old, child, teen, male and female. WHEN IT COMES TO MENTAL ILLNESS, WE ARE ONE. We all have an illness that effects the way we think or behave, the way we process information, etc. We are human beings. We are not crazy, we did not cause this, and we deserve to be loved. In order for this to ever happen, we have to speak up. Be comfortable saying I NEED HELP…I AM NOT OK…LET’S GO TO THERAPY. Be willing to tell your story (no graphic details needed) in order to help others to tell theirs. In their eyes we are lying because we look good and can pull ourselves together; we are not giving up in the fight.
Today’s word for Mental Health Awareness Month on Day 17 is stigma. Due to the mark of disgrace associated with the term mental health or mental illness, those of us who are diagnosed are normally shunned. We are marked with disgrace and considered poor quality. In fear of this reality, many are silent.
There is no way that I should know you for over twenty years and not know that your daughter ran away, or your son attempted suicide or that your father is raping you. There is no way that as men, you should be friends with someone for fifteen years and not be able to confide in them that you are hurting because your wife has cheated, and you cannot move forward or that you are experiencing ED issues and it is causing problems in your marriage. When we have real, honest, open, Godly conversations, with the right people, we can find that we are all in the same boat. We open the opportunity to share experiences, cure for what ails us. Talking about it allows us to receive doctor referrals, emotional support, mentors for our children. etc. We open a stream of communication that paves the way for healing of future generations. THIS IS GENERATIONAL. It is up to us to break the curse one voice, one story, one generation at a time.
MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS!!! Defy the Stigma!
Dying to be Perfect 