It’s Monday, July 4,2022; one day before my 52nd birthday. As I sit here, I feel blessed to see another day, however, I realize that I have lost so much over the last few years.
From my failed marriage that I thought would be forever, my broken family, lost career that I absolutely loved, to lost friendships and betrayals, my life feels nothing like it used to. There are few family outings, few church gatherings, rare “ladies’ nights”, the card parties and just hanging out has ended. The crazy thing, however, is that I no longer allow these things to keep me from meeting new people and doing the things that I love.
On this day, one day before I turn 52, I realize that through it all, God was removing people from my life that I wanted to hold on to. God showed me, through their betrayal, lack of support, and downright rudeness that they were not “FOR ME”. I am thankful for the experience and the character that HE has given me to withstand the doubt, envy, lies, gossip, and betrayal, and the fortitude to stand in my truth while under attack.
My mental and physical health and spiritual healing has been difficult while constantly fighting to survive and provide the bare necessities in which we all benefit from for my son; yet take for granted daily. God has been amazing and has shown up at the last possible minute when there was no one else available, and he has sent others to help whom I never imagined would be a part of my final chapter.
When I FINALLY began to focus on MY healing versus protecting the image of someone else things began to slowly get better for me mentally. I began to receive therapy, use coping skills, manage anxiety, etc. When we finally release our issues and seek assistance, talk about what is binding us, we are able to truly move forward. There are available resources for MENTAL HEALTH. The resources don’t have to be professional, however, unless we speak up, we won’t know.
There is no shame in feeling down, lost, alone, scared, or confused. Above all of the feelings this morning, I feel thankful. Thankful for the greatness that is to come. Thankful that God has given me A VOICE to speak not only for myself, but for others. I refuse to allow anyone to create a false narrative of my life. Whatever the trauma, IT IS REAL. Speaking about my feelings has helped me through. Listening to others has helped me as well. Helping others, by listening to their problems and sharing my experiences to assist with what they may be going through has always helped me. It is therapy for me as well.
I have stepped into MY WINNING SEASON, MY FINAL CHAPTER. I am focused on attaining all that God has prepared for me. I am leaving no stone unturned and never looking back. THIS FINAL CHAPTER WILL BE MY BEST CHAPTER I am embracing the love I receive, the effort to love fully and the desire, determination and ability to love with my whole heart while still expecting people to be decent, loyal and true.
JOIN ME IN MY WINNING SEASON
MENTAL HEALTH MATTERS!!! Defy the Stigma!!!
Dying to be Perfect 