My daughter (left) sent this picture to me. Initially, I cried. I instantly remembered when and where this was taken. Oh, the memories. In the pic on the left, I had just turned 50. I was at the beginning of my divorce saga. I was wearing a size medium 8-10. That was four years ago. I had PEACE, for the first time in about seventeen years. On the right, is me present day. I am much larger than an 8-10 😒🙄. I am STILL actively working to end this saga, and I am thankfully, still at PEACE .
The difference between these two versions of me, is that the financial, mental, and emotional abuse, that I have continued to endure, has severely affected my physical health. Due to severe depression, I have been in an insurmountable amount of physical pain. In addition, the severe depression and anxiety, have affected my employment, and the lack of excercise (due to not working and minimal income), hospital stays and medications, have resulted in severe weight gain (on top of menopause).
Why am I sharing this? Because it’s important to know, that our mental health is important. What our mind goes through, affects our bodies. Currently, I’ve been unable to work for the past eleven months. Not working, results in no insurance, and difficulty in receiving the great medical care I was receiving previously. No work means no paycheck, and a limited income, and very little financial resources. This limits my ability to eat healthy and purchase medicine, and other necessities to improve my overall health. The financial abuse, inflicted by my ex narcissist, of dragging out the divorce proceedings, not paying what is owedin the settlement, lying in order to change the outcome of the settlement, manipulating evidence, reducing my resources, and attempting to turn my children against me with lies, has added to the decline of my mental state, over these last five and a half years.
This picture made me realize the severity of the toll depression has taken on me. The effects of narcissistic abuse, has truly played a huge part, in the downgrade of my physical health. Overall, my weight has been affected, and that negatively affects my health. I’m telling you this, because, many of us are struggling mentally, due to grief, family problems, trauma, and even genetics and generational curses. Some of us are struggling with weight loss, while others have problems with weight gain, and we can’t figure out why. I need you to know, that DEPRESSION IS REAL. It doesn’t only look like staying in bed, a messy space, not eating or eating too much, loss of interest in your favorite things, etc. Depression isn’t limited to negatively impacting our mind, but it affects our overall health.
Looking at the picture on the left, I am reminded of how it felt to wear a smaller size, and I am motivated to push through my circumstances, and lose weight. Depression will not continue to be detrimental to my overall health. This time, next year, I will compare the now pictures, to pictures next year. I vow to noticeably, lose weight. I’m not doing this for anyone, other than me. I not only plan to LOOK GOOD, but I am going to FEEL GOOD also. Now that Ive been constantly working on my mental health, it’s time to get my physical health in check. After all, they go hand in hand.
The moral of the story is, do not allow outward appearance to cause you to judge. The next time you see someone, who has noticeably, loss or gained weight, don’t assume that it’s just what they eat, or how little and how much. Don’t assume that it’s just the individual’s fault, and they are lazy. Remember that trauma, and it’s results, can affect our physicality. Remember…life, and it’s obstacles, can hit us all, and cause serious damage. Remember…mental health matters, and therapy works. TAKE CARE OF YOU. TOGETHER, LET’S HEAL.
THANK GOD I DON’T LOOK LIKE WHAT I’VE BEEN THROUGH
Share this with someone who can use it.
Dani💋❤️
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